How did you come to Jesus?
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_Anonymous
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How did you come to Jesus?
I find Testimonies very encouraging.So how did you come to Jesus? 8)
Last edited by Anonymous on Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm, edited 0 times in total.
Reason:
Reason:
I came to the Lord as a young child at a vacation Bible school. I frankly do not have a vivid memory of the occasion, and, being raised in the faith by my parents, I do not remember any time in my life when I was not committed to Christ. When I was 10, I "recommitted" my life to Christ at a Billy Graham Crusade. My more detailed testimony can be found at my website (http://www.thenarrowpath.com) at the link entitled "host bio."
Last edited by Guest on Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm, edited 0 times in total.
Reason:
Reason:
In Jesus,
Steve
Steve
I would like to share with you my own personal spiritual journey:
1.When I was only 5 years old, I remember a man of God coming to our house. His name was Bill Winslow, a “Shantyman”. He used to walk many miles to bush camps to bring the gospel to the men there. The tough men in these camps normally threw out any minister that dared to enter their camps ---- but not Brother Winslow! They gathered around him and listened to every word. Many submitted their lives to Christ.
One time in a house, Mr. Winslow was witnessing to a man, who was getting more and more disturbed. Finally, he shouted to Brother Winslow that he should stop preaching to him. In great anger, he threatened to throw Bill downstairs if he didn’t desist immediately. Brother Bill just kept right on urging him. Suddenly the man fell to his knees, repenting in tears.
At 5 years of age, when I came near Bill Winslow, I felt something wonderful emanating from him. I didn’t know what it was. All I knew was that if I sat anywhere near him, I experience something very pleasant. I now know that his was the spirit of God flowing through him, and I was somehow bathing in the overflow.
2. At age 7, I began attending a country Sunday School held in the one-room country school house where I attended. My teacher was Christina Winslow, Bill’s wife. I don’t remember anything anything she said in class. All I remember is experiencing that flow of love within me. I recall also, that she brought a cup with her whose exterior was white, and whose interior was black. My experience was new to me, and so powerful. I wanted to tell my brother Billy about it when I got home. Then, when I got there, I didn’t know what to tell him! I wasn’t sure what had happened to me. If I had known, I didn’t have the vocabulary to describe it. After that, I experienced that flow of love again and again.
3. I began reading the Old Testament—from the beginning. When I got to Exodus, and the various feasts prescribed for the Israelites, I wondered why our family did not hold any feasts to honour God. I very much wanted to please God, and so I went to my playhouse and held my own private feasts in His honour.
Later, I read about the Israelites sacrificing to God. I asked my mother why we didn’t sacrifice to God. My mother replied that when Jesus was sacrificed, it was no longer necessary to have animal sacrifices. Her answer seemed to satisfy me at the time.
4. When I was 14, I encountered and began reading fundamentalist tracts which told about how to “get saved”.
“Have I done this?” I asked myself. And so I tried praying the prescribed prayer.
“Jesus, I realize I am a sinner, and that you died for me, so that I would not have to go to hell, but could go to heaven. I hereby accept you as my personal saviour.” Nothing happened. I didn’t experience a thing.
But not every tract said the same thing. Others suggested a different prayer. Maybe I hadn’t done it right the first time. I tried again:
“Jesus, I realize that I am a sinner, and that you died in my place. I accept your finished work on calvary, so that God will no longer regard my sin, but your righteousness.” Still nothing!
Then I read fundamentalist literature that salvation had nothing to do with inner feeling. If I have accepted Christ, I just have to believe that He has saved me regardless of feelings or lack of them. Accept it as true because He said it. “He who believes has eternal life.” So I did. I believed, so I concluded that I was saved and had eternal life. More literature I read convinced me of “eternal security” (unconditional security). Now that I was born again, I could not become unborn.” I rested my belief on:
John 10:27,28 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me; and I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish, and no one shall snatch them out of my hand.
Rom 8:38,39 For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Nothing can separate me from the love of God - not even my own actions. For I wasn’t saved by works, so I can’t lose my salvation through works. And therefore I came to the conclusion that it is impossible for me to go to hell.
5. After my father was killed in a hunting accident when I was 17, my mother and I moved to Barwick. At age 18 and 19, I used to attend the Baptist Church at Barwick, Ontario. Tom Oshiro was the minister at the time. I used to hear Tom speak from Sunday to Sunday, with great fervour, on submission and obedience to Christ. I used to wonder why Tom never preached the gospel. I was so spiritually blind that I failed to recognize that what he preached was the gospel, Tom urged the members of his congregation to submit to Christ. Tom had a wonderful way with young people. He organized young people’s meetings, and he asked me to lead them from time to time. In hearing me speak to the young people, Tom recognized that I had a spiritual problem. Once he asked me, “Don, what are we saved from?”
Knowing the scripture, I said, “From sin.”
Tom replied, “And what does that mean?”
I answered, “We are saved from the results of sin.” I had in mind hell fire.
Tom said, “Don, nowhere does it say we are saved from the results of sin. It says we are saved from sin!” I didn’t accept it at the time. I thought Tom was wrong. But a seed was planted in my heart which eventually bore fruit.
A later Baptist preacher at Barwick suggested that I should be baptized. I didn’t think that baptism was necessary. The preacher told me that since Jesus commanded it, it was important. I asked whether I would be doing as well to get baptised in the Off Lake Covenant Church”
“Oh, no. They believe so-and-so, whereas we believe such-in-such.”
I used to wonder, with all the denominations, how could anyone know which, if any, is right. I couldn’t imagine the apostles Paul and Peter being Baptists, or Presbyterians, or Pentecostals!
In the summer in which I was 19, I worked for the CNR as a section man in Atikokan. There I attended a more conservative and fundamentalist Baptist Church. Both “eternal security” and “predestination”, in the Calvinist sense, were believed. At this time, I was considering baptism. What I didn’t know was that according to conservative Baptist doctrine, you were baptized into the local church. When I learned that, I was reluctant, for I didn’t want to be in any denomination. I considered denominations to be man-made. But through seeking God, I came to believed that He wanted me to be baptized there. So I was baptized in that church. I was expecting the Spirit of God to fall upon me in a special way. But the minister didn’t seem to expect anything. For him, it was just a symbol of what had already taken place in me. Nevertheless, I was blessed by the spirit of this church. Each meeting, the minister gave an invitation to come forward for whatever spiritual need one might have. For about a year, I lived in Atikokan and attended that church.
The following year, I attended Winnipeg Bible Institute in Winnipeg, at 2 Evergreen place, just south of the Osborne bridge. I was particularly interested in studying Greek. I wanted to learn what the New Testament writers really meant. For I was confused by various groups and denominations, each claiming to follow the teachings of the Bible exactly, yet teaching doctrines contrary to one another. I became interested in 2nd century Christian literature. I thought that those church leaders who lived in the days of the apostles or immediately after, were in a better position to understand the NT writings than present-day groups nearly 2000 years later. So I searched out these writings at the Bible school, and later found them in Christian book stores and purchased them for myself.
At the end of the year, I began to think that I had to think about earning a living. What could I do? I didn’t want to continue working as an unskilled labourer. I found out that I could be a qualified teacher by attending teacher’s college for a single year. So I went to Manitoba Teachers College. There I went to Bible studies with a group of Mennonites. They studied, of all things, First John. Now I had been almost ready to reject out of hand 1st John. For it contained statements that did not fit my theology of unconditional security.
I John 1:6 If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not live according to the truth;
I John 2:4 He who says "I know him" but disobeys his commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him;
But especially:
I John3:7,8 Little children, let no one deceive you. He who does right is righteous, as he is righteous. He who commits sin is of the devil; for the devil has sinned from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil.
He who does right is righteous, as he is righteous. I didn’t believe I was righteous by doing right! I believed in imputed righteousness, not my own righteousness. My own righteousness is a filthy rags in God’s sight. I believed in positional righteousness not actual righteousness, because the Jesus the righteous One died in my place. Now when God looks at me, He no longer sees my sin but Christ’s righteousness. But this statement says "as he is righteous". He was righteous, not because righteousness was imputed to Him because He did right. Here it states that Jesus came to destroy the works of the devil. That’s not what I believed. I believed He came to save us from hell!
But somehow I was able to re-interpret first John, and tried to convince the others about “eternal security”, as I called it. One of them asked, “Where do you get that, Don? Where do you find that in the Bible?” I answered immediately, “Why, you find it on every page!”
Right after my marriage at age 24, I had obtained a teaching position in September at Crystal Springs Hutterite Colony, located about 30 mi. south of Winnipeg. I had been told by my Mennonite friends that Hutterites were the black sheep of the Anabaptist family, and that they knew nothing of salvation, that it was a religion of works. In trying to bring the gospel to the Hutterites, I discovered they knew far more about it than I. In those days, my wife and I attended meetings with Major Ian Thomas in Winnipeg. He spoke about the deeper life in Christ. He was so dynamic that though he spoke 2 hours, it seemed like 15 minutes. He compared our place with Jesus with the Israelites coming out of Egypt. He said there were three categories of people: (1)those who are still in Egypt — the lost. (2) those who have come out of Egypt, have crossed the Red Sea, and are wandering around in the desert — carnal Christians who have been redeemed by faith in Christ through His reconciling death but are living in spiritual poverty.(3) those who have crossed the Jordan and are living in the promised land — those who are submitted to Christ, those in whom Christ is living His resurrected life. I accepted this message wholeheartedly, and sought to commit my life to Christ in a way that I hadn’t previously. I began to proclaim this message. I wrote three tracts and had them printed: Are you an Unbelieving Believer? — based on Heb 3:12 “Take heed, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief in departing from the living God.” Will your Christian Works be burned? — based on the wood, hay, and stubble of Cor 3:11-15. “If any one’s work is burned up, he will suffer loss, though he himself will be saved, but only as through fire”. The Difference between Christians and Disciples. This tract defined “Christians” as those in Ian Thomas’s second class, and “disciples” as those in the third class. However...this Christian work was burned! For years later, I read these words in Acts 11:26: "in Antioch the disciples were for the first time called Christians." There is no difference between Christians and disciples. “Christian” is just another word for “disciple.” I burned my tracts since I didn’t want anyone to get hold of this false teaching.
While at the colony, one of the men gave me a copy of the book “The Sermon on the Mount” by Clarence Jordan from Georgia. Clarence and his fellow Christians used to meet together daily, had all things in common as in Acts 2. Their community was called “Koinoia Farm.” The man who started Habitats for Humanity, got his inspiration from Koinonia. Clarence emphasized literal obedience to the teaching of Christ. "He who hears these words of mine and does them is like the wise man who builds his house upon the rock." I came to see that there is only one kind of Christian, the kind who have submitted to Jesus as Lord! During those days, I used to read aloud to my wife, Justin Martyr’s “Dialogue with Trypho.” Justin had been a follower of Plato, but was converted when he met an old Christian while meditating, seeking to see God with the eyes of his soul. Trypho was a Jew who together with his companions met Justin while he was in a lonely place. They discussed spiritual things fo days. I was filled with new understanding concerning the many Old Testament scriptures in which Jesus appeared on earth, and the many prophecies in which his birth was predicted. It was during those days that early Christian literature hit me right between the eyes concerning my beliefs about unconditional security.I repented of this false belief, and opened my mind and heart to the truth as revealed in Scripture.
Since this time, I have realized that Christ requires my total allegiance. Unless He is Lord of all, He cannot be my Lord at all. "Unless your forsake all and follow me, you cannot be my disciple." I cannot do it from self effort, but by the grace of Christ enables me to do it.
Titus 2:11,12 The grace of God has appeared for the salvation of all people, training us to renounce impiety and worldly passions, and to live sensibly, uprightly, and piously in this age...
If I have a time of need, where I just can’t seem to be able to do what I should, or refrain from doing what I shouldn’t, I can come to the throne of grace and receive help from the One who was tempted in all points such as we are, and yet without sin.
Heb 4:15,16 For we have not a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
I wish I could say that from the moment I learned the truth about why Jesus died, and the grace that is available, that I have obeyed the Lord Jesus, and have never sinned since. But if I said that, it would be a lie. Nevertheless, God is at work in me, changing my character, and He who began a good work in me will continue to complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. God has appointed me to be conformed to the image of His Son. I want to keep my appointment. For if I move in that direction, then in the day that our Lord returns, He will raise me up from death and put the finishing touches on the process of perfecting me, and I shall be a completed child of God.
1.When I was only 5 years old, I remember a man of God coming to our house. His name was Bill Winslow, a “Shantyman”. He used to walk many miles to bush camps to bring the gospel to the men there. The tough men in these camps normally threw out any minister that dared to enter their camps ---- but not Brother Winslow! They gathered around him and listened to every word. Many submitted their lives to Christ.
One time in a house, Mr. Winslow was witnessing to a man, who was getting more and more disturbed. Finally, he shouted to Brother Winslow that he should stop preaching to him. In great anger, he threatened to throw Bill downstairs if he didn’t desist immediately. Brother Bill just kept right on urging him. Suddenly the man fell to his knees, repenting in tears.
At 5 years of age, when I came near Bill Winslow, I felt something wonderful emanating from him. I didn’t know what it was. All I knew was that if I sat anywhere near him, I experience something very pleasant. I now know that his was the spirit of God flowing through him, and I was somehow bathing in the overflow.
2. At age 7, I began attending a country Sunday School held in the one-room country school house where I attended. My teacher was Christina Winslow, Bill’s wife. I don’t remember anything anything she said in class. All I remember is experiencing that flow of love within me. I recall also, that she brought a cup with her whose exterior was white, and whose interior was black. My experience was new to me, and so powerful. I wanted to tell my brother Billy about it when I got home. Then, when I got there, I didn’t know what to tell him! I wasn’t sure what had happened to me. If I had known, I didn’t have the vocabulary to describe it. After that, I experienced that flow of love again and again.
3. I began reading the Old Testament—from the beginning. When I got to Exodus, and the various feasts prescribed for the Israelites, I wondered why our family did not hold any feasts to honour God. I very much wanted to please God, and so I went to my playhouse and held my own private feasts in His honour.
Later, I read about the Israelites sacrificing to God. I asked my mother why we didn’t sacrifice to God. My mother replied that when Jesus was sacrificed, it was no longer necessary to have animal sacrifices. Her answer seemed to satisfy me at the time.
4. When I was 14, I encountered and began reading fundamentalist tracts which told about how to “get saved”.
“Have I done this?” I asked myself. And so I tried praying the prescribed prayer.
“Jesus, I realize I am a sinner, and that you died for me, so that I would not have to go to hell, but could go to heaven. I hereby accept you as my personal saviour.” Nothing happened. I didn’t experience a thing.
But not every tract said the same thing. Others suggested a different prayer. Maybe I hadn’t done it right the first time. I tried again:
“Jesus, I realize that I am a sinner, and that you died in my place. I accept your finished work on calvary, so that God will no longer regard my sin, but your righteousness.” Still nothing!
Then I read fundamentalist literature that salvation had nothing to do with inner feeling. If I have accepted Christ, I just have to believe that He has saved me regardless of feelings or lack of them. Accept it as true because He said it. “He who believes has eternal life.” So I did. I believed, so I concluded that I was saved and had eternal life. More literature I read convinced me of “eternal security” (unconditional security). Now that I was born again, I could not become unborn.” I rested my belief on:
John 10:27,28 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me; and I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish, and no one shall snatch them out of my hand.
Rom 8:38,39 For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Nothing can separate me from the love of God - not even my own actions. For I wasn’t saved by works, so I can’t lose my salvation through works. And therefore I came to the conclusion that it is impossible for me to go to hell.
5. After my father was killed in a hunting accident when I was 17, my mother and I moved to Barwick. At age 18 and 19, I used to attend the Baptist Church at Barwick, Ontario. Tom Oshiro was the minister at the time. I used to hear Tom speak from Sunday to Sunday, with great fervour, on submission and obedience to Christ. I used to wonder why Tom never preached the gospel. I was so spiritually blind that I failed to recognize that what he preached was the gospel, Tom urged the members of his congregation to submit to Christ. Tom had a wonderful way with young people. He organized young people’s meetings, and he asked me to lead them from time to time. In hearing me speak to the young people, Tom recognized that I had a spiritual problem. Once he asked me, “Don, what are we saved from?”
Knowing the scripture, I said, “From sin.”
Tom replied, “And what does that mean?”
I answered, “We are saved from the results of sin.” I had in mind hell fire.
Tom said, “Don, nowhere does it say we are saved from the results of sin. It says we are saved from sin!” I didn’t accept it at the time. I thought Tom was wrong. But a seed was planted in my heart which eventually bore fruit.
A later Baptist preacher at Barwick suggested that I should be baptized. I didn’t think that baptism was necessary. The preacher told me that since Jesus commanded it, it was important. I asked whether I would be doing as well to get baptised in the Off Lake Covenant Church”
“Oh, no. They believe so-and-so, whereas we believe such-in-such.”
I used to wonder, with all the denominations, how could anyone know which, if any, is right. I couldn’t imagine the apostles Paul and Peter being Baptists, or Presbyterians, or Pentecostals!
In the summer in which I was 19, I worked for the CNR as a section man in Atikokan. There I attended a more conservative and fundamentalist Baptist Church. Both “eternal security” and “predestination”, in the Calvinist sense, were believed. At this time, I was considering baptism. What I didn’t know was that according to conservative Baptist doctrine, you were baptized into the local church. When I learned that, I was reluctant, for I didn’t want to be in any denomination. I considered denominations to be man-made. But through seeking God, I came to believed that He wanted me to be baptized there. So I was baptized in that church. I was expecting the Spirit of God to fall upon me in a special way. But the minister didn’t seem to expect anything. For him, it was just a symbol of what had already taken place in me. Nevertheless, I was blessed by the spirit of this church. Each meeting, the minister gave an invitation to come forward for whatever spiritual need one might have. For about a year, I lived in Atikokan and attended that church.
The following year, I attended Winnipeg Bible Institute in Winnipeg, at 2 Evergreen place, just south of the Osborne bridge. I was particularly interested in studying Greek. I wanted to learn what the New Testament writers really meant. For I was confused by various groups and denominations, each claiming to follow the teachings of the Bible exactly, yet teaching doctrines contrary to one another. I became interested in 2nd century Christian literature. I thought that those church leaders who lived in the days of the apostles or immediately after, were in a better position to understand the NT writings than present-day groups nearly 2000 years later. So I searched out these writings at the Bible school, and later found them in Christian book stores and purchased them for myself.
At the end of the year, I began to think that I had to think about earning a living. What could I do? I didn’t want to continue working as an unskilled labourer. I found out that I could be a qualified teacher by attending teacher’s college for a single year. So I went to Manitoba Teachers College. There I went to Bible studies with a group of Mennonites. They studied, of all things, First John. Now I had been almost ready to reject out of hand 1st John. For it contained statements that did not fit my theology of unconditional security.
I John 1:6 If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not live according to the truth;
I John 2:4 He who says "I know him" but disobeys his commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him;
But especially:
I John3:7,8 Little children, let no one deceive you. He who does right is righteous, as he is righteous. He who commits sin is of the devil; for the devil has sinned from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil.
He who does right is righteous, as he is righteous. I didn’t believe I was righteous by doing right! I believed in imputed righteousness, not my own righteousness. My own righteousness is a filthy rags in God’s sight. I believed in positional righteousness not actual righteousness, because the Jesus the righteous One died in my place. Now when God looks at me, He no longer sees my sin but Christ’s righteousness. But this statement says "as he is righteous". He was righteous, not because righteousness was imputed to Him because He did right. Here it states that Jesus came to destroy the works of the devil. That’s not what I believed. I believed He came to save us from hell!
But somehow I was able to re-interpret first John, and tried to convince the others about “eternal security”, as I called it. One of them asked, “Where do you get that, Don? Where do you find that in the Bible?” I answered immediately, “Why, you find it on every page!”
Right after my marriage at age 24, I had obtained a teaching position in September at Crystal Springs Hutterite Colony, located about 30 mi. south of Winnipeg. I had been told by my Mennonite friends that Hutterites were the black sheep of the Anabaptist family, and that they knew nothing of salvation, that it was a religion of works. In trying to bring the gospel to the Hutterites, I discovered they knew far more about it than I. In those days, my wife and I attended meetings with Major Ian Thomas in Winnipeg. He spoke about the deeper life in Christ. He was so dynamic that though he spoke 2 hours, it seemed like 15 minutes. He compared our place with Jesus with the Israelites coming out of Egypt. He said there were three categories of people: (1)those who are still in Egypt — the lost. (2) those who have come out of Egypt, have crossed the Red Sea, and are wandering around in the desert — carnal Christians who have been redeemed by faith in Christ through His reconciling death but are living in spiritual poverty.(3) those who have crossed the Jordan and are living in the promised land — those who are submitted to Christ, those in whom Christ is living His resurrected life. I accepted this message wholeheartedly, and sought to commit my life to Christ in a way that I hadn’t previously. I began to proclaim this message. I wrote three tracts and had them printed: Are you an Unbelieving Believer? — based on Heb 3:12 “Take heed, brethren, lest there be in any of you an evil heart of unbelief in departing from the living God.” Will your Christian Works be burned? — based on the wood, hay, and stubble of Cor 3:11-15. “If any one’s work is burned up, he will suffer loss, though he himself will be saved, but only as through fire”. The Difference between Christians and Disciples. This tract defined “Christians” as those in Ian Thomas’s second class, and “disciples” as those in the third class. However...this Christian work was burned! For years later, I read these words in Acts 11:26: "in Antioch the disciples were for the first time called Christians." There is no difference between Christians and disciples. “Christian” is just another word for “disciple.” I burned my tracts since I didn’t want anyone to get hold of this false teaching.
While at the colony, one of the men gave me a copy of the book “The Sermon on the Mount” by Clarence Jordan from Georgia. Clarence and his fellow Christians used to meet together daily, had all things in common as in Acts 2. Their community was called “Koinoia Farm.” The man who started Habitats for Humanity, got his inspiration from Koinonia. Clarence emphasized literal obedience to the teaching of Christ. "He who hears these words of mine and does them is like the wise man who builds his house upon the rock." I came to see that there is only one kind of Christian, the kind who have submitted to Jesus as Lord! During those days, I used to read aloud to my wife, Justin Martyr’s “Dialogue with Trypho.” Justin had been a follower of Plato, but was converted when he met an old Christian while meditating, seeking to see God with the eyes of his soul. Trypho was a Jew who together with his companions met Justin while he was in a lonely place. They discussed spiritual things fo days. I was filled with new understanding concerning the many Old Testament scriptures in which Jesus appeared on earth, and the many prophecies in which his birth was predicted. It was during those days that early Christian literature hit me right between the eyes concerning my beliefs about unconditional security.I repented of this false belief, and opened my mind and heart to the truth as revealed in Scripture.
Since this time, I have realized that Christ requires my total allegiance. Unless He is Lord of all, He cannot be my Lord at all. "Unless your forsake all and follow me, you cannot be my disciple." I cannot do it from self effort, but by the grace of Christ enables me to do it.
Titus 2:11,12 The grace of God has appeared for the salvation of all people, training us to renounce impiety and worldly passions, and to live sensibly, uprightly, and piously in this age...
If I have a time of need, where I just can’t seem to be able to do what I should, or refrain from doing what I shouldn’t, I can come to the throne of grace and receive help from the One who was tempted in all points such as we are, and yet without sin.
Heb 4:15,16 For we have not a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
I wish I could say that from the moment I learned the truth about why Jesus died, and the grace that is available, that I have obeyed the Lord Jesus, and have never sinned since. But if I said that, it would be a lie. Nevertheless, God is at work in me, changing my character, and He who began a good work in me will continue to complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. God has appointed me to be conformed to the image of His Son. I want to keep my appointment. For if I move in that direction, then in the day that our Lord returns, He will raise me up from death and put the finishing touches on the process of perfecting me, and I shall be a completed child of God.
Last edited by Guest on Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm, edited 0 times in total.
Reason:
Reason:
Paidion
Avatar --- Age 45
"Not one soul will ever be redeemed from hell but by being saved from his sins, from the evil in him." --- George MacDonald
Avatar --- Age 45
"Not one soul will ever be redeemed from hell but by being saved from his sins, from the evil in him." --- George MacDonald
When I was 17 I didn't really like my life. Too shy to get a girlfriend. Too short to star in sports. Too average to be popular. I didn't have many friends at all to be honest. Even at church, where most of my meaningful friendships existed, I was feeling more and more out of place. Something was missing.
Each year my family went to our district family camp at Houghton College. This was the highlight of my year growing up. But recent years had gotten worse and worse. I was too old to just have fun riding bikes around all week, too unsure of myself to flirt with 'district' girls, too prideful to just hang out with the little kids all day. Things were getting worse.
Evening sermons were brutal. It was hot. Sermons were long. Vacation time was ticking away. Tim Elmore was the speaker that year. One particular night his preaching seemed to speak to my heart. When he finished speaking the Spirit didn't. I tried to ignore Him by hanging out with my friends in the lounge. They started telling dirty jokes. I was sick of same old same old. I stood up and walked away silently. Someone asked, 'where's he going?' I just kept walking.
I locked my door, knelt beside my bed, and prayed. I cried. I rarely cry. I told God everything. I think it lasted about 15 minutes. Then I saw my Bible. Took it. Opened it. Read the first verses my eyes landed on. Romans 12:1-2, 'be transformed by the renewing of your mind.' I told God I was ready to be changed.
Now what? I tried to stand. I couldn't stand. I didn't know why. The only thing I could think to do was be silent before God. And then He spoke. Not in an audible voice, but not just in my mind either. Something in between somehow. He told me to be a pastor. I questioned Him. He repeated. I questioned again. He became silent.
For the remainder of camp that year I was quiet as usual, but now it was a different kind of quiet. Before it was a quiet depression, now it was a quiet wonder. I told nobody. Words had been faked for too long to be of value. I just lived. Differently. Less angry. Less bitter. Less worried. More nervous, but the good anticipatory type of nervousness. More gentle. Things seemed to happen slower, or maybe more things seemed to be significant.
I was changing, but into what? How could God make me a pastor? It seemed ridiculous. I started to doubt. Maybe I had added the 'pastor' part of that night myself. I asked God for a sign, something to assure me that it really had been His voice. The very next Sunday morning my pastor came up to me in the hallway. He grabbed me by the shoulders, looked me in the eye, and asked, 'were you called into the ministry last week?' I nodded, or something. I don't remember. I hadn't told anyone.
It's been 6 years since that week. Since then I've graduated twice and now serve as the assistant pastor of my home church. I've changed a lot. God has changed me. I believe I am more like Christ almost every day. Even though my 'greatest' sins have also been since that week (and/or I have greater sense of my sinfulness), my greatest victories have too.
Sometimes I have incredible doubts. I even doubt that God spoke to me that night. Maybe I did tell someone and that someone told my pastor. I was sure I didn't, but maybe I'm just forgetting. Maybe the skeptics are right. I feel attracted to questions about faith. Investigating them usually adds to my faith, but once in a while it starts to crack.
It is my prayer, though, that I will fight the good fight of faith, that I'll come out victorious with Christ, that I'll enter His presence and hear Him say, 'Well done, good and faithful servant!'
Each year my family went to our district family camp at Houghton College. This was the highlight of my year growing up. But recent years had gotten worse and worse. I was too old to just have fun riding bikes around all week, too unsure of myself to flirt with 'district' girls, too prideful to just hang out with the little kids all day. Things were getting worse.
Evening sermons were brutal. It was hot. Sermons were long. Vacation time was ticking away. Tim Elmore was the speaker that year. One particular night his preaching seemed to speak to my heart. When he finished speaking the Spirit didn't. I tried to ignore Him by hanging out with my friends in the lounge. They started telling dirty jokes. I was sick of same old same old. I stood up and walked away silently. Someone asked, 'where's he going?' I just kept walking.
I locked my door, knelt beside my bed, and prayed. I cried. I rarely cry. I told God everything. I think it lasted about 15 minutes. Then I saw my Bible. Took it. Opened it. Read the first verses my eyes landed on. Romans 12:1-2, 'be transformed by the renewing of your mind.' I told God I was ready to be changed.
Now what? I tried to stand. I couldn't stand. I didn't know why. The only thing I could think to do was be silent before God. And then He spoke. Not in an audible voice, but not just in my mind either. Something in between somehow. He told me to be a pastor. I questioned Him. He repeated. I questioned again. He became silent.
For the remainder of camp that year I was quiet as usual, but now it was a different kind of quiet. Before it was a quiet depression, now it was a quiet wonder. I told nobody. Words had been faked for too long to be of value. I just lived. Differently. Less angry. Less bitter. Less worried. More nervous, but the good anticipatory type of nervousness. More gentle. Things seemed to happen slower, or maybe more things seemed to be significant.
I was changing, but into what? How could God make me a pastor? It seemed ridiculous. I started to doubt. Maybe I had added the 'pastor' part of that night myself. I asked God for a sign, something to assure me that it really had been His voice. The very next Sunday morning my pastor came up to me in the hallway. He grabbed me by the shoulders, looked me in the eye, and asked, 'were you called into the ministry last week?' I nodded, or something. I don't remember. I hadn't told anyone.
It's been 6 years since that week. Since then I've graduated twice and now serve as the assistant pastor of my home church. I've changed a lot. God has changed me. I believe I am more like Christ almost every day. Even though my 'greatest' sins have also been since that week (and/or I have greater sense of my sinfulness), my greatest victories have too.
Sometimes I have incredible doubts. I even doubt that God spoke to me that night. Maybe I did tell someone and that someone told my pastor. I was sure I didn't, but maybe I'm just forgetting. Maybe the skeptics are right. I feel attracted to questions about faith. Investigating them usually adds to my faith, but once in a while it starts to crack.
It is my prayer, though, that I will fight the good fight of faith, that I'll come out victorious with Christ, that I'll enter His presence and hear Him say, 'Well done, good and faithful servant!'
Last edited by Guest on Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm, edited 0 times in total.
Reason:
Reason:
Hemingway once said: 'The world is a fine place and worth fighting for'
I agree with the second part (se7en)
I agree with the second part (se7en)
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_Anonymous
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- Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 10:03 pm
I awoke this morning to two fantastic and interesting testimonies.
Thank you both for sharing it has started my day in a great way!
When I wake each day I say, "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight oh Lord". I truly hope God doesn't find this as repitition as it is said with my entire heart.
Thank you both for sharing it has started my day in a great way!
When I wake each day I say, "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight oh Lord". I truly hope God doesn't find this as repitition as it is said with my entire heart.
Last edited by Anonymous on Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm, edited 0 times in total.
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Reason:
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_Anonymous
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- Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 10:03 pm
I was born into probably the best situation possible to become a Christian. My Christian roots go back for generations. One of my grandfathers was a minister; he led my father to the Lord before he married my mom. Maybe my dad just wanted to marry my mom, but my grandfather really did a good job discipling my dad... my dad is one of the greatest Christians I know. My mom had been friends with Jim and Elizabeth Eliot before he was killed. In fact she knew all of the missionaries that were killed that day. My parents took their responsibilities as Christian parents very seriously. We were always at church. After church on Sunday, we had to go over the sermon and the lessons we had in Sunday School to make sure we got the message. My mom had devotions with us in the mornings before school and my dad read a chapter of the Bible aloud every night after dinner. I accepted Jesus as my savior when I was 9 years old and was baptized when I was 10. So, the rest of the story should be that I went to a Christian College, and after two or three short term mission trips, I married a like-minded Christian fellow, and raised a quiver-full of Christian children.
But, no.
I DID go to a Christian College, well one that at one time had a Christian reputation, not so much lately. Anyway, the first year there, at the age of 18, I met a guy - a Christian guy. He was smart and funny and quirky. He was also having doubts about his faith. I'm not sure why I went along with all his ideas, I guess I thought I was deeply in love (I doubt I was.) We tried a lot of new experiences, alcohol, drugs, sex, the occult. I still thought of myself as a believer at that time, but I kept on doing more and more sinful things. I broke up with that guy, the one I was supposed to be so in love with, over some stupid thing. I should have come to my senses and come back to the Loving Father, but I didn't.
I continued in that lifestyle for a few years and developed a fondness for cocaine. This was in the 70's when cocaine was expensive so I started sleeping around in order to get drugs. Not like a prostitute, just hooking up with any guy that would give me drugs. That's how I met my husband. He had LOTS of drugs. I actually did fall in love with him, but I was attracted to the drugs first. Then I got pregnant and we decided to get married before the baby was born. We also decided that I should stop taking drugs while I was pregnant (thoughtful, huh?) Here's a little fact about me, I never dreamed of being a wife and mother. I didn't NOT want to, I just never thought about it, never dreamed about weddings or husbands, or any of that stuff. I was pregnant once before and miscarried early on. I never cried. Anyway, I figured I would just give up drugs for 7 months (yeah, I was still using coke before I knew I was pregnant), and then go back to the way I had been living. I was shocked, in a big way, when I first laid eyes on my daughter and had a rush of love like I had never experienced before. I came to realize that her needs were way more important than mine, so I never did take any drugs again. Well, once, but there was a reason...well not a good one, but it was just that one time. I asked my husband to remove all the drugs and paraphenalia out of our house, and he did. I don't know if he was still using drugs at that time or not. He used to sell drugs from his business, so that might have continued. Anyway, by appearances, we were living a very clean life. I really loved him and never thought of being unfaithful to him. We were just a nice young couple with a baby daughter and two years later a son.
Then, after being "good" for awhile, I realized that there was a huge hole in our lives. I guess my upbringing paid off here, because I knew exactly what was missing -- the Lord. So I tried to pray. My problem was that I kept telling God how much he needed US, not that I was willing to lay it all down at his feet and be available for Him or that I needed His grace and mercy. You know how in comics and cartoons they show the person's mind as a lightbulb over their head? Well, my was not turned on, that's for sure.
In 1985, decided to go back to school for something to do in the evenings and eventually to get a teaching credential. One night as I fixed dinner before school, thought about what a happy family evening it was, my mother-in-law was living with us, I was loved by my husband and had some of the cutest children in the world. Later when I left for school, I kissed my husband goodbye and told him I loved him.
When I came home later that evening, my husband had fallen asleep in a chair watching T.V. I cleaned up around the house, kissed the sleeping children, and went to wake up my husband so he could go to bed. Only he wouldn't wake up. I screamed for my mother-in-law and when she saw him, she started wailing. She knew he was gone, but I still didn't think he was dead. As she went to wait for the firefighters, I thought, 'Maybe he's just now stopped breathing. I bet I remember some CPR,' so I pulled him down from the chair and as he hit the floor, the lightbulb suddenly came on...I had a sudden knowing. I knew my husband was dead. I knew I far away from God, and I knew I needed Him more than anything else right then. So, kneeling right there, I cried out to God that I needed Him and I was sorry for my sins. And God was really there! I don't know how to explain it, but I knew that He was there and I know that I was forgiven and love by Him.
The next few hours and days were a nightmare, there were firemen and policemen and an investigation. It turns out that my husband had a heart attack at the age of35. I think it was probably due to the drug use, but there were no drugs in his system that night. Through all of that and the funeral I had an amazing sense of peace. I was broke with no job and two children to support. I still had peace.
And then there is the amazing way God takes care of His children. Many times money would show up just at the right time. A couple of times a job would be offered to me just when another job ended.
And the Holy Spirit has been teaching me ever since. I hope that I'm becoming more and more like Him. That is my deepest desire now. I can't really say why I turned my back on Him 30 years ago...I can't imagine ever doing that again. I love Him.
Michelle
But, no.
I DID go to a Christian College, well one that at one time had a Christian reputation, not so much lately. Anyway, the first year there, at the age of 18, I met a guy - a Christian guy. He was smart and funny and quirky. He was also having doubts about his faith. I'm not sure why I went along with all his ideas, I guess I thought I was deeply in love (I doubt I was.) We tried a lot of new experiences, alcohol, drugs, sex, the occult. I still thought of myself as a believer at that time, but I kept on doing more and more sinful things. I broke up with that guy, the one I was supposed to be so in love with, over some stupid thing. I should have come to my senses and come back to the Loving Father, but I didn't.
I continued in that lifestyle for a few years and developed a fondness for cocaine. This was in the 70's when cocaine was expensive so I started sleeping around in order to get drugs. Not like a prostitute, just hooking up with any guy that would give me drugs. That's how I met my husband. He had LOTS of drugs. I actually did fall in love with him, but I was attracted to the drugs first. Then I got pregnant and we decided to get married before the baby was born. We also decided that I should stop taking drugs while I was pregnant (thoughtful, huh?) Here's a little fact about me, I never dreamed of being a wife and mother. I didn't NOT want to, I just never thought about it, never dreamed about weddings or husbands, or any of that stuff. I was pregnant once before and miscarried early on. I never cried. Anyway, I figured I would just give up drugs for 7 months (yeah, I was still using coke before I knew I was pregnant), and then go back to the way I had been living. I was shocked, in a big way, when I first laid eyes on my daughter and had a rush of love like I had never experienced before. I came to realize that her needs were way more important than mine, so I never did take any drugs again. Well, once, but there was a reason...well not a good one, but it was just that one time. I asked my husband to remove all the drugs and paraphenalia out of our house, and he did. I don't know if he was still using drugs at that time or not. He used to sell drugs from his business, so that might have continued. Anyway, by appearances, we were living a very clean life. I really loved him and never thought of being unfaithful to him. We were just a nice young couple with a baby daughter and two years later a son.
Then, after being "good" for awhile, I realized that there was a huge hole in our lives. I guess my upbringing paid off here, because I knew exactly what was missing -- the Lord. So I tried to pray. My problem was that I kept telling God how much he needed US, not that I was willing to lay it all down at his feet and be available for Him or that I needed His grace and mercy. You know how in comics and cartoons they show the person's mind as a lightbulb over their head? Well, my was not turned on, that's for sure.
In 1985, decided to go back to school for something to do in the evenings and eventually to get a teaching credential. One night as I fixed dinner before school, thought about what a happy family evening it was, my mother-in-law was living with us, I was loved by my husband and had some of the cutest children in the world. Later when I left for school, I kissed my husband goodbye and told him I loved him.
When I came home later that evening, my husband had fallen asleep in a chair watching T.V. I cleaned up around the house, kissed the sleeping children, and went to wake up my husband so he could go to bed. Only he wouldn't wake up. I screamed for my mother-in-law and when she saw him, she started wailing. She knew he was gone, but I still didn't think he was dead. As she went to wait for the firefighters, I thought, 'Maybe he's just now stopped breathing. I bet I remember some CPR,' so I pulled him down from the chair and as he hit the floor, the lightbulb suddenly came on...I had a sudden knowing. I knew my husband was dead. I knew I far away from God, and I knew I needed Him more than anything else right then. So, kneeling right there, I cried out to God that I needed Him and I was sorry for my sins. And God was really there! I don't know how to explain it, but I knew that He was there and I know that I was forgiven and love by Him.
The next few hours and days were a nightmare, there were firemen and policemen and an investigation. It turns out that my husband had a heart attack at the age of35. I think it was probably due to the drug use, but there were no drugs in his system that night. Through all of that and the funeral I had an amazing sense of peace. I was broke with no job and two children to support. I still had peace.
And then there is the amazing way God takes care of His children. Many times money would show up just at the right time. A couple of times a job would be offered to me just when another job ended.
And the Holy Spirit has been teaching me ever since. I hope that I'm becoming more and more like Him. That is my deepest desire now. I can't really say why I turned my back on Him 30 years ago...I can't imagine ever doing that again. I love Him.
Michelle
Last edited by Anonymous on Sun Sep 25, 2005 11:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason:
Reason:
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_Anonymous
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- Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 10:03 pm
MIchelle,
IF you could only know how much your testimony has meant to me.
I needed to hear it, TODAY! isnt God's timing incredible?
I was saved hitchhiking because I was raised in a liberal family
and never heard of Jesus until late 20's..............anyways, I raised
a child in a christian home and tho' this person is not on drugs,
he is far from God.....
Did you re-marry?
How long did you stray?
MANY thanks
IF you could only know how much your testimony has meant to me.
I needed to hear it, TODAY! isnt God's timing incredible?
I was saved hitchhiking because I was raised in a liberal family
and never heard of Jesus until late 20's..............anyways, I raised
a child in a christian home and tho' this person is not on drugs,
he is far from God.....
Did you re-marry?
How long did you stray?
MANY thanks
Last edited by Anonymous on Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm, edited 0 times in total.
Reason:
Reason:
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_Anonymous
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- Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2008 10:03 pm
Wow, thanks Friend! I wasn't sure why I felt compelled to post my testimony. Thanks for telling me what the reason was!
I never remarried. Maybe I wasn't meant to ever be married - I don't know.
I strayed away from the Lord for about 12 years. I'll be praying for your child, along with mine.
I never remarried. Maybe I wasn't meant to ever be married - I don't know.
I strayed away from the Lord for about 12 years. I'll be praying for your child, along with mine.
Last edited by Anonymous on Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm, edited 0 times in total.
Reason:
Reason: