Hi Glow,
Just speaking for myself, it's hard to know what you're asking. Reading between the lines, it sounds like there is a certain person in your life that has behaved less than kind and loving towards you and you're wondering if you should continue to have a relationship with that person. And I'm assuming this person is not your husband. If this is what you're looking for help on, I think you might be better served seeking counsel from mature and godly people who know you, love you, and have a personal concern for what is in your best interest. A bible forum can only provide you with scripture based
opinions and prayers for you at best (which I for one will be happy pray for you).
Having said all that, I don't mind sharing my
opinions on some general principles. Just keep in mind that they are just that...opinions.
In dealing with situations where common sense says one thing and your heart says another, I think it's important to remember that God is the one who gave us common sense to begin with. Our feelings are often unreliable. The bible says:
Jer 17:9
9 "The heart is deceitful above all things,
And desperately wicked;
Who can know it?
NKJV
That is not to say we should never go against common sense, but rather recognize that just because we want something to be so, doesn't mean God will bring it to pass.
You wrote:
What do you do when,many people around you are saying ( fellow real Christians), Hey that is just common sense you do not enter into a place where there could be physical, spiritual or emotional danger to you and you don't do it vs doing it and thinking well, in common sense it doesn't make sense to me right now and others may not agree, , but I believe in my faith in God I need to stick this out, or go do this thing anyways because they are asking me too. etc.
Although the majority is not always right, sometimes an objective piece of advice from someone looking in from the outside with nothing at stake is worth listening to. This passage comes to mind:
Prov 11:14
14 Where there is no counsel, the people fall;
But in the multitude of counselors there is safety.
NKJV
You wrote:
I know there is talk of the wordly kind of trust we have some what in people like, if some one says they will call you at a certain time over and over and they don't you can have a good idea not to trust that action in them. But isn't there a place where God could still call you to believe that person could still actually get it together to tell you what they are going to do some day if you hang in there long enough and let God change them. And then they actually do the thing.Waiting on the Lords timing.
If trust is betrayed, I see no reason to keep extending it to someone. Forgiveness we are to offer freely, but trust must be earned in my opinion. It seems that Paul and Barnabas quarreled over this very thing:
Acts 15:36-40
36 Then after some days Paul said to Barnabas, "Let us now go back and visit our brethren in every city where we have preached the word of the Lord, and see how they are doing." 37 Now Barnabas was determined to take with them John called Mark. 38 But Paul insisted that they should not take with them the one who had departed from them in Pamphylia, and had not gone with them to the work. 39 Then the contention became so sharp that they parted from one another. And so Barnabas took Mark and sailed to Cyprus; 40 but Paul chose Silas and departed, being commended by the brethren to the grace of God.
NKJV
It seems that John/Mark had earlier proven himself to be less than dependable and Paul was uncomfortable trusting him for this mission. Notice that Paul was the one whom the brethren "commended to the grace of God" when they departed on their mission, showing that he had their approval. We never hear from Barnabas again.
We are commanded to love one another, but sometimes it's best to love certain people from a distance. This is especially true if that person in any way hinders our relationship or faithfulness to the Lord.
You wrote:
I get more confused though when it gets in the area of someone close to you having very different view points on Chrisitan doctrine and applying it so strongly you feel like you are being abused by them or they are trying to control you by it. Especially when they are a man and some how think because you are a woman they have more insight than you do because eve was deceived first.
Again, I'm assuming this is not your husband. Biblically speaking, you are not subject to any man who is either not either your husband or your father (and that only if you're unmarried) in my opinion. You are subject to Jesus.
You use the word "abuse" a few times. I have to confess that I don't know what "spiritual" or "emotional" abuse is, but I know that physical abuse is criminal and should be treated as such.
I know you're probably seeking better answers than this, but without knowing you personally or your situation, vague scriptural generalities is the best we can do. Again, I would encourage you to seek counsel from those mature, godly people that know and love you.
I will pray for your situation and for God to give you wisdom in dealing with it.
Lord bless.