A marriage that disagrees on tithing
Posted: Sat Jun 01, 2013 10:41 am
Hi guys. I just wanted to throw my situation out there to see if I can get any advice.
I'm the kind of guy that wants to limit the problems in my marriage as much as possible. I'm married to a good Christian woman who loves the Lord and wants to do His will. She's convinced that tithing to the local church is an obligation we have. I have absolutely zero problem doing it, though in my mind, it would be a regular percentage that we give and not the fulfillment of a command from God. I have let her know that I see no such command, but I'll gladly go along with it considering I do want to give to my local church anyhow.
Yet, over the years, we've accumulated some debt. This is not from stupid indulgences. In fact, we drive old cars, have no cable tv (which is fine), rarely even go out to eat, never go on vacation. We've accumulated this debt by having three children, doctor bills, college loans, a 401K loan to get our AC fixed, You know, things of that nature
Though we eventually pay our bills, we are often put on collection lists and things like that. We are not meeting our obligations in the manner that our creditors would like, yet we pay our tithes. Now, those in the church I attend would see this as being faithful to God through the hard times. I don't know but that I see it as being unfaithful to obligations to others in the name of God . I almost think this is UNpleasing to the Lord rather than pleasing to Him. Yet, I don't know how to express that to my wife. I'd love to be in the kind of financial situation where we could give tithes or whatever we give out of what we legitimately have, instead of taking from who we owe to fulfill a perceived obligation..... Yet, I don't want her to go against her conscience toward God.
You who have a marriage where you are in agreement on most things have no clue how fortunate you are. I love my wife with all my heart but I sure wish we saw eye to eye a little more than we do.
I feel like I've done a bit of rambling here, but any thoughts on this would be appreciated. Thanks, guys
I'm the kind of guy that wants to limit the problems in my marriage as much as possible. I'm married to a good Christian woman who loves the Lord and wants to do His will. She's convinced that tithing to the local church is an obligation we have. I have absolutely zero problem doing it, though in my mind, it would be a regular percentage that we give and not the fulfillment of a command from God. I have let her know that I see no such command, but I'll gladly go along with it considering I do want to give to my local church anyhow.
Yet, over the years, we've accumulated some debt. This is not from stupid indulgences. In fact, we drive old cars, have no cable tv (which is fine), rarely even go out to eat, never go on vacation. We've accumulated this debt by having three children, doctor bills, college loans, a 401K loan to get our AC fixed, You know, things of that nature
Though we eventually pay our bills, we are often put on collection lists and things like that. We are not meeting our obligations in the manner that our creditors would like, yet we pay our tithes. Now, those in the church I attend would see this as being faithful to God through the hard times. I don't know but that I see it as being unfaithful to obligations to others in the name of God . I almost think this is UNpleasing to the Lord rather than pleasing to Him. Yet, I don't know how to express that to my wife. I'd love to be in the kind of financial situation where we could give tithes or whatever we give out of what we legitimately have, instead of taking from who we owe to fulfill a perceived obligation..... Yet, I don't want her to go against her conscience toward God.
You who have a marriage where you are in agreement on most things have no clue how fortunate you are. I love my wife with all my heart but I sure wish we saw eye to eye a little more than we do.
I feel like I've done a bit of rambling here, but any thoughts on this would be appreciated. Thanks, guys