Correcting other Christians?

[Guest]

Christopher, you're probably right. The reason I brought up the example of Jesus rebuking the pharisees is because Steve made a similar point in one of his lectures although I may have misunderstood what he meant. I've downloaded nearly all the mp3s on his site so I may be getting a couple of points confused here. We'll call it "information overload."

I guess you would make a distinction between correction and rebuke and I think that's wise. Maybe I'm just a wimp but I don't like rebuking brothers. I even have a hard time correcting brothers that are clearly in err, though I've done so on numerous occasions and always felt kind of weird afterward.

Recently, there was a friend of mine who was clearly living in unrepentent sin and he was being groomed for full-time ministry. I wanted to go to this brother privately but was told by a third party that he doesn't like or respect me (he thinks I'm a heretic because I told him I don't believe people literally burn in a pit of hellfire forever) and refuses to speak to me. So I went to a leader in the church who was grooming him. Basically, this brother refuses to change (although he said he has repented) and there's nothing else I can do. Now the guy won't even shake my hand because of this mess. I tried to follow the biblical pattern but now I just feel like a troublemaker. Is that normal?

[Guest]

Hi JC,

you wrote:

Basically, this brother refuses to change (although he said he has repented) and there's nothing else I can do. Now the guy won't even shake my hand because of this mess. I tried to follow the biblical pattern but now I just feel like a troublemaker. Is that normal?

No it's not normal. But I'm afraid that it's not uncommon among Christians either. A true Christian should not feel threatened or insulted by a humble rebuke or exhortation from a brother who is speaking from the scriptures, he should welcome it and be thankful for it. Unfortunately, pride runs deep in many of us and some are just not open to receive correction from certain people.

What is normal is that we are to pursue peace with each other as much as it depends on us (Heb 12:14, Rom 12:18, 2 Tim 2:22, etc.). If you have done everything you can to reconcile with the brother, I don't know that there's much left to do but leave it in God's hands and be at peace in your own conscience.

[Guest]

A true Christian should not feel threatened or insulted by a humble rebuke or exhortation from a brother who is speaking from the scriptures, he should welcome it and be thankful for it.

You are absolutely right, Christopher. This has been my position for a long time. But I thought that I would not accept a rebuke that was offered with a hateful and condemning attitude.

Then, a couple of years ago my dear wife challenged me on this. Why won't you accept such a rebuke? Even though the rebuker has a bad attitude, what if he is right? That remark offered in a poignant moment made a major change in my own attitude. Now I listen carefully to one who rebukes me in anger. Often I tell the person that I will carefully consider what he has said, and examine myself and my motives.