The Narrow Path Ministries

I have heard Steve mention a couple times that he thinks the marriage requirement for elders is not just that they not be polygamists (in order to accurately portray Christ and the church) , but also that an elder should not be a single man (in order to show that he can run his house well). At least, that is my recollection and paraphrase, I may be off in my memory.

In the same way, would we say that elders must have children? What if a man is married but has no children, is he eligible to be an elder biblically speaking? The reason I'm asking is that I know of several cases where there is a man and wife who are godly and faithful, have a great marriage and all that, but who have one or more children whose lives could be called into question. Because of their children's behavior, their eligibility for eldership could be questioned. If we took those same married couples, but they never had kids, we would never know that they might be lacking in those particular leadership skills. So, is it necessary that elders be parents in order to more accurately assess their leadership ability?

This is why I left you in Crete, so that you might put what remained into order, and appoint elders in every town as I directed you-- if anyone is above reproach, the husband of one wife, and his children are believers and not open to the charge of debauchery or insubordination. For an overseer, as God’s steward, must be above reproach. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain, but hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined. (Titus 1:5-8)

Why does Paul use "IF anyone..."? Isn't the implication that IF anyone is the above reproach, IF anyone is married and the husband of one wife, IF anyone has children and his children are believers and not open to charges of debauchery and insubordination, THEN he would make a suitable elder? Paul is not saying than an elder MUST be married and have children, but if he DOES have them, he must have only one wife, and his children must be believers and well-behaved.

However Paul says that an overseer MUST be above reproach, not arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain, but hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined.